old habits die hard

I am reconsidering. I am unaware of the risks I'm taking, I am not thinking straight but frankly just saying whatever occurs to me. I am being way too honest, so straight forward.
I don't know why, but yet I still realize that what I am doing is wrong yet right. (I think they call that confusion, perplexity, disarrangement or whatever you prefer).

and the stupidest thing of all is that I have done this before. I have been complicating things like this, I have been mixing things up in the past. So yes, I do know what the price will be like and yes I do know that it involves some unpleasant eyeopeners and suchlike. but you know what? I don't really care.. well yeah, I do care, because I know that it ain't that smart to act like this. but the people I really do care about, and that are worth it because they are still here after everything we went through, they are still there. I love them, I care for them, I shelter them.

we're at the age of (un)innocence. what we do, the mistakes we make now, will it really affect our future? I don't really think so.
So let's make and break, let's make the same mistakes over and over again until we learn from it, let's tore down what we built up.sometimes in life, you need some spice. 
(read; excitement, risks, hazardous, renewal.. etc.)
- in moderation. cause there are still some boundaries, limits and so one you need to take into account.

so spread that spiciness, bring up the heat! (: <3