drama drama drama

oh don't we all just hate drama.. Funny thing is, we cause it ourselves.. fuck I hate causing drama. I mean I know people say things like "everything happens for a reason"or "you learn something from every mistake", but I'm not sure that that's actually true. Sometimes we make the same mistakes over and over again, without learning anything. Well that's how it feels anyway.. I wish I'd learned something the first time around, and I did, but apparently it wasn't enough. God I hate myself for doing all this, I hate myself for making it so hard for you to love me. I mean it's just so lame, because everything about this situation is totally and completely wrong and messed up. Nothing I did was done the right day, I should've done everything different. Oh I can be so stupid, dammit, damn me.


Okay, I just realized that I'm complaining to my computer, and it wasn't my intention to turn this blog into a pessimistic bunch of stories. Hmm, I should definitely try to change that. Oh I'm having such a hard time typing, this is just not normal anymore. I have quite a hangover, yeah. I so have to explain how that happened to you later, because it was such a crazy fucking night. :p definitely a night to remember! <3